Monday, July 24, 2023

Have you ever been working toward a goal, only to realize after pouring yourself into it, you weren’t getting where you thought you were going?

Maybe your destination wasn’t what you expected, like the poor repairman who meant to be at my house but ended up on the other side of town because he wrote down “Street” instead of “Boulevard.” Or maybe you had the right goal, but the steps you thought would get you closer to that destination were actually leading away from it. Personally, I have a habit of getting so caught up in my tasks that I lose sight of my goal.

This can happen in relationships too. Have you ever intended to build a relationship on unconditional love but found yourself fighting for it instead?

Deep down, we all want unconditional love—so how do we get so far from the goal at times? I have a theory. As much as we crave unconditional love, conditional love sometimes looks more secure on paper. If I had to earn that love, by my own works and worth, by fighting and doing everything right, then maybe I can control if I lose that love. Unearned, unconditional love, on the other hand, can feel scary. It can make us feel unworthy—and if we didn’t earn it by our own efforts, that means our own efforts don’t determine if we get to keep it.

For me, control feels comfortable at times. I like to believe I have the power to protect all the things—and people—that matter to me. But that sense of control never brings lasting comfort or true security—it’s just an illusion. As Oregon Campus Pastor Andy Rectenwald taught us this weekend, true security grows as we work from, not for. In a life-giving relationship, we build from a place of love and acceptance, instead of trying to earn those things.

Fortunately, we have a perfect example of unconditional love in Jesus. No matter what you’ve done in your past, he loves you; no matter what happens in the future, he will continue to love you.

Unfortunately, even after we’ve accepted Jesus’ love, it can be hard for us to receive this kind of unconditional love.

Colossians 2:6-7
⁶ And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. ⁷ Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.

If we want to experience the meaningful, purposeful, freeing life Jesus calls us to, it starts by learning to live from his unconditional love instead of feeling we have to earn it—and we have to let that love spill over into the way we give and receive love from others. We can’t fully live from what Jesus did for us when we’re living for someone else’s approval.

Colossians 2:8
Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ.

We still need wise friends and outside perspectives, but don’t let anyone trick you into following what isn’t God or thinking you need to earn the love you are freely given. God wants better for you.

Questions:
When have you caught yourself working toward something that wasn’t actually what you thought it was or what you wanted?

Do you struggle to give or receive unconditional love? Why do you think that is?

What would it look like for you to live from God’s unconditional love today? What would it mean for that to spill over into your other relationships?

Next Steps:
A strong home starts with a firm foundation. Take steps to build your firm foundation rooted in Jesus. Invest in your relationship with him by setting aside time each day to read his Word and pray. Write his truths in your heart by memorizing verses, so it will be with you when you need it. Surround yourself with trusted Christ followers you can lean on or turn to for perspective by attending a life-giving church on the weekend and joining a Group.

Prayer:
Heavenly Father, I thank you for your unconditional love. Thank you for sacrificing your Son so I can experience a love I could never earn. Help me to live from this love in all I do, instead of trying to earn it. Teach me to show your unconditional love to those around me and to build my life on its foundation. May I keep my eyes on you and the purpose you have called me to. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

Series Theme Verse:

Colossians 1:23
But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it. Don’t drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News. The Good News has been preached all over the world, and I, Paul, have been appointed as God’s servant to proclaim it.