It Just Isn’t Fair

Weekend Series: Sounds of Summer

DreamTeam Writer: Lydia Snyder

Wednesday, June 21, 2023

My parents hear the phrase, “It’s not fair!” a lot. Someone got to go to a friend’s house, someone didn’t have to clean up their mess, or someone watched extra TV. My siblings and I find so many reasons for why things aren’t fair. A few years ago, my dad came up with the saying, “It’s never fair when you compare,” but that doesn't stop us from complaining.

In the book of Luke, Jesus told a story about two sons who became estranged from their father. The younger son took his part of the inheritance and left home, only to return later because he ran out of money. The father threw a party to welcome his younger son, even though he didn’t deserve it. When invited to come join in the celebration for his younger brother, the older brother definitely compared.

Luke 15:28–30
28 “The older brother was angry and wouldn’t go in. His father came out and begged him, 29 but he replied, ‘All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to. And in all that time you never gave me even one young goat for a feast with my friends. 30 Yet when this son of yours comes back after squandering your money on prostitutes, you celebrate by killing the fattened calf!’”

Honestly, I am a lot more like the older son than the younger. I will continue to be obedient, while inside, I grow bitter about all the things that just don’t seem fair to me.

When we get in this “not fair” mindset, we focus more on trying to please God than on just trusting him. We work and strive and struggle, until we wind up exhausted and entitled.

God doesn’t want us to worry when things don’t seem fair. And he certainly doesn’t want us to work so hard to earn his favor, because we already have it. Instead, God wants us to just trust him—to simply trust that he delights in us and know that we can count on him.

Ephesians 4:31-32
31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Jesus' parable ends with an invitation to all of us prodigal children. Will we stay outside, feeling bitter and complaining about how unfair things are? Or will we join in the party knowing that God is already pleased with us?

Questions:
When do you find yourself asking God about fairness? How often do you try to please God, rather than simply trust him? Are you willing to let go of your bitterness to celebrate with God?

Next Steps:
Find a way to let go of any bitterness you might have, whether that means writing it down, going for a good run, talking with someone in your Group, or meeting with a counselor. Next time you find yourself working to please God, pause and take a deep breath. Then, remember that God is already pleased with you, no matter what you do.

Read The Prodigal God by Tim Keller—it is an incredible book!

Prayer:
Father, it is so much easier to complain than to celebrate. I want to give you my bitterness so you can fill me up with joy and peace instead. Help me to be grateful for the small things and to trust you with any problems or challenges I might face today. I love you. Amen.

Series Theme Verse:

Ecclesiastes 9:17
“Better to hear the quiet words of a wise person than the shouts of a foolish king.” 

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